Wednesday, March 19, 2014

The Past and the Future

THE PAST ~ Growing up, I never wanted to get married or have children (they were my two greatest fears). Not that I had anything against marriage or children. I think it really all came down to the fact that I never really wanted to "grow up".  Even when playing "house" as a child, I never wanted to play the role of mom, or "Queen" (somehow I thought being a queen automatically meant you were a mom). I was always the daughter or the "princess" (to me being a princess meant you were not married).

Well, obviously that has all changed. God changed my heart and showed me that my fears were nothing to fear at all. He was only going to give me good things - things that were good for me.

I met Joey (now my husband of almost 3 years) in the Summer of 2010.  We were engaged that Fall and got married the next Spring. Funny thing was, about a month before I met him, I had told my parents that I never wanted to get married- there was no one for me out there. To which my mother replied "I have been praying for your husband since you were born.. and I want grandchildren!" Well, her prayers were answered. And might I add that being married to Joey is MUCH better than I could've ever imagined it would be.

Fear number 1 had been conquered. Being married was (and is) amazing. I still had fear number 2 ahead of me.. At that time I thought it was WAY ahead of me, not 6 months post-marriage.

The day I found out I was pregnant with Audriana, I cried and cried. Being pregnant was the last thing I wanted at that time. All the fears of body changes, new responsibility and most of all  the pain of childbirth were rushing through my mind. I was terrified. But then, at 8 weeks pregnant, I heard her little heartbeat for the first time. I was in love already. When I had the ultrasound and found out she was a girl, I was excited. And when I saw her little face on the 3D ultrasound, I couldn't wait to meet her.

The day finally came for me to meet Audriana. I was induced at 7am on July 11th 2012. By 1:46 pm she was born. My labor and delivery was WAY less painful than expected (I think mostly due to the wonderful Epidural). God had showed me again that childbirth, in my case, was nothing to fear. I know I had it way easier than a lot of women do (for which I am so thankful). It was the best experience possible.

Joey and Audriana are two of the best things that have ever happened to me. I'm so glad that God changed my heart towards marriage and having children.

THE FUTURE - "I don't know what the future holds, but I know who holds the future."

I am hoping for more children in my future ~

Found this on the clearance rack. Couldn't pass it up.

My first baby sweater completed! Hope to have another little one to fill it.

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